We Have a Secret.

CLICK HERE & LISTEN ON APPLE ITUNES

CLICK HERE & WATCH ON YOUTUBE

*Sign up for Weekly Updates HERE!

To Our Teenage Child,

We have a secret.  We have a BIG secret.  We have a secret that we have been keeping from you for some time.  Maybe now it’s finally time to share. Maybe. 

 But let me take you back first…

To describe how we felt the day you were born is hard.  The reason why it is hard is because there are no words that exist in our language today to define how we felt on that day.  Happiness, joy, love, excitement, bliss, affection…those words help, but it doesn’t even come close to describing how incredible that day was when you arrived. 

From day one, you became our entire world.  And as we held you for the first time, and we looked into your brand-new eyes taking in this world, we realized the enormous responsibility that was being placed upon our shoulders.

Selfish with our time…that was gone.  Sleeping in late in the morning…that would not exist for quite some time.  Taking time to care for ourselves…well, let’s be real, that was over for now.  Not having a care in the world…that was long gone…forever.  But here is the interesting part…We.Didn’t.Care!  We didn’t care because we were so in love with you.  

 And as we held you for the first time and looked into those beautiful eyes, we made a promise to you.  A promise you wouldn’t remember, but one we will never forget.  A promise to guide you, to protect you, to love you and, most importantly, to be the parents you need, always and forever, even if you didn’t like it.  Even…if you didn’t like us.

But there was one thing we didn’t realize back then.  One thing that we never anticipated happening.  One thing we haven’t shared with you yet…until now.  

We.Are.Scared.  

We are so incredibly scared. We are so afraid as we help you navigate this part of your life.  We had no idea how hard raising a teenager was going to be.  We truly had no idea. 

As your parents, we are doing our best to try to help direct you during this time in your life.  We are trying to guide you to be respectful, to be kind, to try hard, to make good decisions, and to love everyone.  We are trying our very best to help you to grow into your very best self.  But it’s so much easier to say than to actually do.

So, let’s be honest and talk about what really scares us. 

We get very worried when we get into heated arguments with you.  We are worried because whenever we fight, you seem to think this means that we don’t love you.  Or you think that we feel you are a bad person.  But the real reason we get so angry is because we love you so much, and we are scared of your decisions.

We are extremely anxious when we have to make you accountable for your actions because when we do, we know you won’t like us very much.  It’s hard for us to wrap our hearts around that.  We know we aren’t cool parents that let you do whatever you want.  We know. But we also know we can’t be.  We can’t be if we are going to live up to that promise we made.  And it scares us that this will affect our relationship with you these last few years we have you at home.

We are frightened of social media, and how it is becoming such an important part of your life.  You have access to literally the whole entire world, and what you don’t realize yet is that the world isn’t always good and full of good people.  We have always loved how trusting you can be, but with social media, it frightens us who will take advantage of that. 

We are scared that the more freedom we give you, the more dangerous situations you may be put in. Situations that you might not be able to handle.  What if you end up in the wrong place at the wrong time?  We would feel that it is all our fault, that we didn’t protect you.  And that’s scary because you are our whole universe…literally.

And mostly, we are just terrified that we aren’t doing this right…as parents.  We are trying our very best to raise you the best way we know how.  While we know you are bound to make mistakes along the way, what you may not realize is that we know that we are bound to make mistakes too.  While being a teenager isn’t easy, let’s be clear, being a parent isn’t easy either.  We are trying to do the very best we can…for you.

So here is the thing, sweet child. Way back when, we made a promise. A promise you don’t remember…one we will never forget.  We promised to love you, protect you, guide you, and to be the parents you need, always and forever, even when you don’t like us.  But we never promised, not even for a second, that we wouldn’t be scared.  If it’s even possible, we love you more now than the day you were born. So yes, we are without a doubt, scared. And maybe now really is the time to tell you all of this.  Maybe now you finally need to know…Maybe.

Love you Always,

Your Parents

Xoxo

Marsha 

*For those of you struggling with something in life or have a topic of interest that you want me to talk about in this blog, email me at BeYourBestSelfBlog@gmail.com.  Let’s work together to Be Our Best Selves!

Photo Credit:  Photo by Kat Jayne from Pexels